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Astonished

A Story of Evil, Blessings, Grace, and Solace

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available
A bestselling memoirist bravely tells the story of the night evil paid her a visit—and how prayer chased evil away
Beverly Donofrio had already lived two lives, first as a scrappy young mother on the streets of the East Village and later as the bestselling author of Riding in Cars with Boys. By the time she reached her fifties, she thought she had seen it all.
Now, even though she was living in a vibrant, picturesque Mexican town, where she practiced yoga, drank margaritas in her backyard, and took salsa lessons, she felt lost and was searching for monasteries to visit. The religious practice that had nourished her for several years had faded. She missed God. Then one night she woke to find a rapist holding a knife to her throat. So begins the memoir that charts Donofrio’s journey—a long and twisting road through denial, mourning, anger, vulnerability, and retreat at five very different monasteries.
Told through Donofrio’s brutally honest, often ribald, emotionally unsparing voice, Astonished is a tender and hopeful narrative of healing and learning to love life again.
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    • Publisher's Weekly

      December 24, 2012
      In her third autobiographical work (after Looking for Mary) Donofrio wrestles spiritually with the concept of evil after being raped at knifepoint in her Mexico home. Having finally found her way as a writer midlife, become a pious Catholic, and settled in the old colonial town of San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, in a house she built herself, Donofrio was 55 and a new grandmother when she was attacked by the town’s serial rapist in her own bedroom one night in June. Her testimony and work with the police soon after helped bring the man to justice, but Donofrio was shaken in her Christian faith, angry at God for allowing such senseless evil, and plunged into a spiritual crisis involving an overwhelming sense of vulnerability and shame. Finding refuge in a monastery seemed the only way to feel truly safe, and the bulk of her thoughtfully circuitous narrative dwells on her six-month pilgrimage to various monasteries, among the Trappists at St. Benedict’s in Snowmass, Colo., the Carmelites at Nada Hermitage in Crestone, Colo., and at her midwife friend Estrella’sHoly Land retreat in the Missouri Ozarks, among other places. Donofrio searched for a deeper relationship to Jesus by immersing herself in prayer, meditation, and writings by the church fathers, saints, and mystics, which she lists in a last chapter; and she even contemplated becoming a nun. Yet the simple act of asking questions proved a salve, as she depicts in this insightful, candidly unfolding, soul-bearing journey to grace. Agent, Gail Hochman, Brandt & Hochman Literary.

    • Kirkus

      February 1, 2013
      Donofrio (Looking for Mary, 2000, etc.) recounts her survival from rape at age 55 and subsequent spiritual journey. Best known for Riding in Cars with Boys (1990), her first memoir about her teenage pregnancy and single motherhood, the author was raised Catholic. As an adult, following years without religious practice, Donofrio developed a deep love for and affinity with the Virgin Mary and returned to Catholicism. In 2006, while living peacefully as an expat in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, Donofrio awoke to find herself held at knife point by the town's serial rapist. "I did not want to believe in a God that would let this happen," she writes at the book's beginning. After the man was caught weeks later, Donofrio remained unsettled, wrestling with feelings of having been violated and spiritual questions concerning good and evil. In search of stillness and safety, she planned to leave for six months to visit five places, most of which were monasteries. The bulk of the narrative follows this pilgrimage, which included stays with the Trappists at St. Benedict and the Carmelites at Nada Hermitage, both in Colorado, and at a friend's Missouri retreat center. Donofrio devoted her days to prayer and meditation, as well as the study of spiritual writings, which she lists in the narrative. Her story is one of reconciliation; she felt herself grow closer to Jesus while shedding some of her decades-old protective holding patterns and bitterness toward men. She considered, then decided against, becoming a nun. The conclusion of her journey, following her torrent of questions for and about divine power, lies in her realization that her faith is unshakeable and her attack, ultimately, showed her the heart of God. Honest, engaging and cathartic.

      COPYRIGHT(2013) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • Library Journal

      October 1, 2012

      Donofrio has already made her mark with the best-selling Riding in Cars with Boys, translated into 16 languages and made into a film, and Discover pick Looking for Mary. Here she writes about overcoming fear and anger after awakening one night at her home in Mexico with a rapist holding a knife to her throat. Donofrio also recounts time later spent in five monasteries, hoping to touch the face of God. With a five-city tour.

      Copyright 2012 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

    • Booklist

      March 1, 2013
      It wasn't supposed to happen to someone like hera middle-aged writer acclaimed for Riding in Cars with Boys (1990), which was made into a movie starring Drew Barrymore. Yet she was raped in her own bed in her home in Mexico. It is a chilling story, and in this compelling, spiritually fulfilling memoir, Donofrio takes the reader through that terrible night and its aftermath. But this is more than a straightforward description of a crime; it is a story of healing and even, as the title indicates, grace. Donofrio was attacked at the time she was thinking about joining a monastery, and the rape made her reconsider not only her life but also her faith. Anyone who has been the victim of a crime will appreciate Donofrio's honesty and sympathy, but her memoir is for everyone who appreciates a story well told. It is an unsparing but also hopeful account of evil, misery, and suffering, as well as joy, goodness, and forgiveness. Don't run from the pain, she writes. She doesn't. Instead, Astonished transcends it.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2013, American Library Association.)

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